Proverbs 18:13
13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.
I am very well aware that my positions of Conditional Immortality (Annihilationism) and Unitarianism will cause the vast majority of my fellow Christians to write me off immediately, and without a hearing. I completely understand why, and I myself would have done the same in the past. It is my hope that even if one dismisses me, that perhaps they will return later, maybe on a day when their conscience is pricked while wondering about "why Eternal Conscious Torment?", or being puzzled over the Trinity after reading a passage of Scripture which controverts it, and refusing to accept a "none-too-compelling-but-everyone-accepts-it" answer that they are offered.
Here, I will offer a very brief overview of why I changed my mind on these things, which may give some insight into how someone can undergo such a large theological progression even after defending a doctrine for many years.
The traditional positions on Hell and the nature of God find themselves in a very odd position in modern Christianity. With regard to Hell, functionally, most Christians never witness, which betrays that most of them don't really think about Hell very often, and if they do, they aren't really sure who is going there, and if they are, they don't really think it will last forever, or if they do, they don't really think about what it will be like. Therefore, somehow, there are nearly 2 billion people who attend churches professing that the lost will endure eternal, unending torment, and yet very few, if any, are frantically begging their families, neighbors, friends, and everyone else to believe in the Savior in order to avoid this most infinitely horrible fate.
If they hazard to ask about the horrifying doctrine, they may receive clichés such as, "sin against an eternal God requires eternal punishment", or "sin deserves infinite punishment if God is infinitely just". "Oh", they may say, even though they are not sure why any of that would be the case, as these things are definitely not obviously true, nor does the Bible state them. The person repeating the clichés is not really to blame - they probably have no idea why they are saying such illogical things anyway, and are merely attempting to justify what they think the Bible teaches on the matter. The few verses of Scripture in which hyperbolic language is used to describe the fate of the lost, mostly occurring in visions, may be hauled out, and the enquirer will be assured that these controvert the apparent message of dozens or hundreds of verses which extol God's mercy, His love, His measured, sensible, merciful justice, and the promised final eradication of suffering and death from His creation.
If one examines the Annihilationist interpretations of the (very few) verses used to support Eternal Conscious Torment, and finds them compelling, they now find themselves in a difficult position. They know that they will be dismissed as a liberal, whose rationality is clouded by their emotions, if they ever give voice to their new position. They know they will need to attend, in all likelihood, a church which does not teach Annihilationism. They know they will be told by people they respect that it is rather far more rational, Biblical, holy, and righteous for God to never forgive, and to torment forever, many who died as young as 14 years old (or in the Imperialist denominations, every unbaptized infant), and that they are a compromised heretic for rejecting such an obvious doctrine of Scripture.
Still, one may be an open Annihilationist and carry on a relatively normal Christian existence in some less Fundamentalist contexts, or, if they keep it hidden, they may encounter very little trouble at all, only having to silently disagree with the odd sermon (which may be years apart, as actual defenses of Eternal Conscious Torment are rare as a sermon subject in nearly all denominations).
Unitarianism, however, is wholly different. No matter how much Protestants may despise Catholics, or Catholics the Orthodox, or Orthodox the Protestants, all can unite in hatred and anathemas against Unitarians. Nevermind that far less than 1% of their laity could defend the doctrine of the Trinity in debate, or even answer basic questions about the doctrine (see Appendix I) - all are assured that this is one line that cannot be crossed, or challenged, and seldom even discussed, because it is absolutely definitional, Scripturally certain, and all who do not believe it are wicked, liberal, dumb, and/or blasphemous, and so must be avoided.
This immovable line is drawn by Trinitarians, and anathemas are doled out abundantly, despite the recognition from even Trinitarian scholars that the doctrine is extremely difficult, partially mysterious or incomprehensible, and fraught with the potential for error:
The Trinity - An Introduction, by Scott R. Swain - Introduction
No topic of study is more rewarding, or more challenging, than the doctrine of the Trinity. Nor is any topic of study fraught with greater possibility of error.
The Trinity - An Introduction, by Scott R. Swain - Chapter 5
The mystery of the Son's eternal begetting is one that mortal minds cannot fathom. Because it is a divine begetting, it is an unsearchable deep (Ps. 145:3; Rom. 11:33).
The Trinity, by Karl Rahner - Section IIA
The dogma of the Trinity is an absolute mystery which we do not understand even after it has been revealed.
The Trinity, by Jack Hayford - Chapter 1
Don't be surprised if you find this concept mysterious. It is perfectly logical that the very essence of God's being would exceed our full capacity to understand!
The Forgotten Trinity, by James White - Chapter 1
So why don't we talk about loving the Trinity? Most Christians do not understand what the term means and have only a vague idea of the reality it represents. We don't love things that we consider very complicated, obtuse, or just downright difficult.
The Fount of Knowledge, by John of Damascus - Book 2: On Heresies
And so, let the faithful adore God with a mind that is not overcurious. And believe that He is God in three hypostases, although the manner in which He is so is beyond manner, for God is incomprehensible. Do not ask how the Trinity is Trinity, for the Trinity is inscrutable.
Select Treatises of St. Athanasius, Translated and Annotated by John Henry Newman - Discourse 4, Subject 1
The Mystery of the Doctrine of the Holy Trinity is not merely a verbal contradiction, but an incompatibility in the human ideas conveyed by them. We can scarcely make a nearer approach to an exact enunciation of it, than that of saying that one thing is two things.
The Baltimore Catechism, Annotated by Thomas Kinkead - Question 30
Question: Can we fully understand how the three Divine Persons are one and the same God?
Answer: We cannot fully understand how the three Divine Persons are one and the same God, because this is a mystery.
"Fully" - entirely. We can partly understand it. We know what one God is and we know what three persons are; but how these two things go together is the part we do not understand - the mystery.
Basic Theology, by Charles Ryrie - Chapter 8
Even with all the discussion and delineation that we attempt in relation to the Trinity, we must acknowledge that it is in the final analysis a mystery. We accept all the data as truth even though they go beyond our understanding.
Christian Theology, by Millard Erickson - Chapter 14
In the final analysis, the Trinity is incomprehensible. We cannot fully understand its mystery.
Christian Theology, by Millard Erickson - Chapter 14
We do not hold the doctrine of the Trinity because it is self-evident or logically cogent. We hold it because God has revealed that this is what he is like. As someone has said of this doctrine:
Try to explain it, and you'll lose your mind;
But try to deny it, and you'll lose your soul.
Systematic Theology, edited by Stanley Horton - Chapter 5
Indeed, the historical formulation of the doctrine of the Trinity is properly characterized as a terminological maze wherein many paths lead to heretical dead ends.
Systematic Theology, by Wayne Grudem - Part 2, Chapter 14
The difference in persons must be one of relationship, not one of being, and yet each person must really exist. This tri-personal form of being is far beyond our ability to comprehend. It is a kind of existence far different from anything we have experienced and far different from anything else in the universe.
Because the existence of three persons in one God is something beyond our understanding, Christian theology has come to use the word "person" to speak of these differences in relationship, not because we fully understand what is meant by the word "person" when referring to the Trinity, but rather so that we might say something instead of saying nothing at all.
Systematic Theology, by Louis Berkhof - Part I, Chapter 8
The Church confesses the Trinity to be a mystery beyond the comprehension of man. The Trinity is a mystery, not merely in the Biblical sense that it is a truth, which was formerly hidden but is now revealed; but in the sense that man cannot comprehend it and make it intelligible. It is intelligible in some of its relations and modes of manifestation, but unintelligible in its essential nature.
Systematic Theology in One Volume, by Norman Geisler - Chapter 10
In view of this distinction, the Trinity should be treated as a mystery, not a problem. Once the basic elements are understood, we should not attempt to unscrew the inscrutable. We should not analyze it, but admire it; we should not dissect it, but devote ourselves to it. It is an object of worship, not scholarship. As has been well said, if one tries to understand it completely (as a problem), he may lose his mind, and if he does not believe it sincerely, he may lose his soul!
The disparity between the lack of general understanding of the doctrine, and intensity of the venomous hatred for all who dare to deny it, demonstrates the kind of traditional dogmatism that underlies it. Why else would failing to accept something so non-obvious elicit such hatred?
My own theological development in this regard began with defending the Trinity and Deity of Christ against Jehovah's Witnesses, and later, Muslims. At first, I did not give the doctrine much thought, as it was so obviously definitional to me, and I strung together some responses which rehashed the standard replies to common challenges to the Trinity. Later, more serious challenges were put to my view, which led me to adopt a formal Trinitarian position (Classical Trinitarianism), replacing my previously ill-defined, informal, Social Trinitarian-leaning position - the position of many who would notionally affirm the Trinity without formally studying it.
The Classical Trinitarian position, in attempt to avoid Tritheism, is very philosophically complex, and not intuitive at all. I was struck by just how little Scripture was being appealed to, and how much was made of verses or even parts of verses which did not at all clearly state what was being drawn from them. Yet, I did not want to hold a view which nearly all of Christianity disagreed with, and let go of a view which I had notionally held since even before I was born again, and so I intellectually submitted myself to the Classical definition, while finding it quite unsatisfying.
Later, I remember undertaking a critique of a Muslim dawah ebook which had a section on the Trinity, and as I typed out my standard Trinitarian responses, it occurred to me that many of them seemed contrived. I had heard these critiques many times, yet, on that occasion, I was feeling particularly unsatisfied with the convoluted and uncompelling nature of the doctrine that I was trying to defend. I did not publish the critique, but rather compartmentalized the matter, and moved on, mostly on the basis that I thought the Deity of Christ was very easy to prove, and so did not feel a need to fully comprehend the Trinity. This is the position of the vast majority of Trinitarians, who know little to nothing about the Trinity, but feel a deep attachment to the Deity of Christ. Yet, if there is one God, and if the Father is God, and the Son is God, and the Son is not the Father, unless one wants to live in contradiction or be a polytheist, they need some way of reconciling those beliefs, and therefore, the doctrine of the Trinity must be confronted. Most push the matter to the periphery, and that is what I did at this time.
However, in early 2025, when I began to take a step back from polemics, and returned to studying theology in an attempt to define a more organized doctrinal basis for Free Grace Christianity, I found myself at an impasse regarding the Trinity. It was something that I knew "needed" to be definitional, and defended, and yet, I knew that the case for the doctrine was not clear, and was not something that I felt like I could bind to another person's conscience, because I was an apologist who defended it, and still had lots of logical incongruities and Scriptural uncertainties regarding it.
What persisted in bothering me about the doctrine was mainly this:
Additionally, I had, in the past, put a lot of weight on verses which I believed proved that Jesus Christ pre-existed His earthly life, or can be worshipped, or called "God", or prayed to - each of which I thought were absolute proofs that He must be Almighty God. By this point, however, I had learned that there were historical and modern forms of Unitarianism which accommodated all of those things, and that Unitarianism did not pigeonhole me into a purely human, or denigratory view of Jesus. And, while I remained Trinitarian while learning of these positions at various points, they removed a lot of the barriers that I had regarding Unitarianism, and made it seem like a more compelling position, in light of the other things that Scripture says about Jesus and God, and aiming to have a coherent view of God that I can actually explain and share.
So, while I am a fallible human being who does not have all of the answers, as of now I believe that a Unitarian understanding of Scripture, wherein God the Father is God, and Jesus is the most exalted creation of God (Colossians 1:15, Revelation 3:14), is more compelling, both logically and Biblically, than a Trinitarian view. I believe that the Trinity hypothesis is an attempt to reconcile Monotheism with a misreading of a few texts which people think teach the Deity of Christ (see this article), and that it creates far more problems than it "solves", because there is no problem to solve - there is one God, the Father (John 17:3: 1 Corinthians 8:6, Ephesians 4:6: 1 Timothy 2:5), and the Father is the God of Jesus Christ (Micah 5:2-4, Matthew 27:46, Mark 15:34, John 20:17, Romans 15:6: 2 Corinthians 1:3, 11:31, Ephesians 1:3, 1:17: 1 Peter 1:3, Hebrews 1:8-9, Revelation 1:5-6, 3:2, 3:12, 5:10), and is superior to Jesus Christ (John 14:28: 1 Corinthians 3:22-23, 11:3, 15:24-28).
Additionally, I am aware that this belief will ensure that I am excluded from nearly all fellowship with other Christians for the rest of my life. That, however, cannot be a criteria for determining truth. "To go against conscience is neither right nor safe", and my conscience convicts me of the truthfulness of these doctrines, and, as a result, I do not really care what the social consequences are for believing them.
Lastly, I thought it would be useful to anticipate and answer some questions/comments which will likely either come from those who knew me when I was a Trinitarian, or who are otherwise offended by my positions here:
Basic Trinitarian questions for Trinitarians to test themselves with:
The main division within Unitarianism is over whether or not Jesus Christ pre-existed His birth in Bethlehem (or more precisely, His conception within the virgin Mary). Those who hold to the view that Jesus pre-existed His birth are normally labeled "Arians", after Arius (256-336 AD), and those who reject that view are usually called "Socinians", after Lelio Sozzini (1525-1562 AD) and Fausto Sozzini (1539-1604 AD). These terms are unhelpful, as neither Arius nor the Sozzinis founded their associated view of Jesus's pre-existence, nor do those labelled Arians or Socinians in modern times actually properly "follow" their namesakes (as Lutherans follow Luther, Calvinists Calvin, Thomists Thomas Aquinas, etc.). So, while the terms are common, this section will forego both of them in favor of referring to the positions as the "pre-existent view" or the "non-pre-existent view".
The following is an examination of passages which are commonly brought forth to support the view that Jesus pre-existed His birth, presenting at least one possible pre-existence and non-pre-existence view for each passage:
Though I currently favor the pre-existent view, I understand how others can come to hold the non-pre-existent view, and do not generally find their interpretations to be Biblically impossible or unreasonable. However, what I have very little patience for is any sectarian dogmatism from either camp, especially those who hold to the non-pre-existent view suggesting that those who hold to pre-existence somehow deny the true humanity of Jesus Christ, or are in some way Gnostic.
If the Scriptures do in fact teach that Jesus pre-existed His birth in Bethlehem, then they also teach that God performed the operation of making Him human through a miraculous virgin birth, and that there is no conflict between those two propositions. It seems speculative, and very narrow, to attempt to build any kind of dogmatic case that Scripture teaches that a pre-existence is absolutely impossible for God's Messiah, as there is no explicit statement of any kind in the Bible to that effect. There are many ways in which God could create a spiritual being, and then have that being become human by whatever means or in whatever sense He deemed appropriate. It must be kept in mind that Jesus is unique, in anyone's estimation - normal humans are not born of virgins, or exalted to the kind of authority and power that Jesus is described as having. So, a narrow-minded view that attempts to declare an incarnation either Biblically incongruent or logically impossible (and then causes grief for others, and creates division on that basis) should be exhorted to exercise more humility before presuming to speak on what God could or couldn't do with respect to the ontology of His Messiah.